Sometimes, it’s not until you ask for help with one thing in your life that you realise you’ve been facing challenges elsewhere that have been impacting your wellbeing.
And for Humberside firefighter Paul Burchett, a trip to Jubilee House, our centre in Cumbria, for support with his physical health, led to him finding the help he really needed for his financial wellbeing and mental health.
Father-of-three Paul began facing pressures with his finances around two years ago, following the breakdown of his marriage. However, as debts mounted up, he continued to try and face them alone without asking for help.
It was only around six months ago when he finally realised how bad things had got, as the knock-on effect of the stress around his finances began to hit both his physical and mental health.
“Two years ago I split from my ex-wife and it just went downhill from there,” says Paul. “I started to struggle with the fitness tests at work and couldn’t work out why. I play football, I’m very active, I go to the gym now and again, but I just wasn’t able to pass the test.
“I’d been suffering with depression, but not knowing how much.”
Realising he needed a helping hand with his fitness, Paul got in touch with us and was offered a stay at Jubilee House.
“When I got there, I did a few sessions where I was told about the support I could have,” says Paul.
“I started to think, maybe there is something more mentally here… I enquired about how they could help and they put me in touch with one of the psychological therapists. It went from there.”
Following his visit, Paul had regular calls with a counsellor who helped him find ways of coping with the challenges he was facing.
“We’ve gone through coping strategies, breathing techniques, how to be more confident in myself, how not to let people get on top of me. It’s helped me deal with situations and learn to take myself away from them,” he adds.
“As I started speaking to my psychological therapist, he suggested I look at the Welfare team as well. They’ve helped me hugely.
“Financially, when I split with my wife, I had to sell the house to move in by myself. I’ve got three boys to look after – we have them equally. I pay her some child maintenance and everything had just got on top of me, I didn’t know where to turn.
“My anxiety and the money situation were definitely linked. I was trying to be there for my boys and that all weighed heavily on me. In the current climate as well, it’s still not brilliant but we’re getting there.
“Finding out the charity could help me with my debts too was great.”
He adds: “They rung me up, took some details, and have since been able to offer me some food vouchers, some hardship payments as well as a lot of advice and signposting. They’ve been really helpful.
“Looking after three boys, having the reassurance that I can feed them and myself means everything. If I need anything else, I know I can turn to The Fire Fighters Charity and they’ll help me in whatever way they can.”
Now, as cost of living increases are hitting households across the UK, Paul is spreading the word about the support he’s received, to hopefully encourage any colleagues who may be struggling to reach out early – before it gets to the point that he did.
“In the current climate, the charity is so helpful,” he says. “Hopefully they’ll continue to be able to be there for all of us, with our help.”
Since working with our teams, Paul began to build up his fitness to get back on the run. And he says his son ultimately inspired him to get over the final hurdle with his fitness test.
“I do the walk test on the treadmill and I was having a mental block at around 10 minutes, to get over that last hurdle,” says Paul.
“I tried everything, putting the TV on, turning music up, covering the machine, nothing worked. But the week before my fitness test, my son said, ‘Daddy I want to be like you’, which spurred me on to get that last two minutes to get back on the run.
“It worked. I was thinking of him. They love what I do. Every time the pager goes off, no matter what they’re doing, they see me go. They’re really proud.”
Sadly, shortly after returning to work full-time, Paul tore his Achilles which has meant he’s off work again.
“Coping with being off work is hard,” he adds. “At the moment I can’t do anything really, so getting around is quite hard, but I know that if anything was to happen or I needed someone to talk to, I could just ring the charity and there’ll be someone there.”
As a final message to anyone reading his story, Paul says: “I would encourage anybody to speak up about mental health, I bottled it up for maybe years before I spoke to anyone about it. Now I have it’s opened a whole new world and I’d encourage anyone to speak out and not be worried about it.”
And for anyone facing financial difficulties, Paul says: “Ask the charity before you need any extra benefits or anything if you can. They’re there to help in more ways than one. I’ve found out since I went to Penrith that it’s not just for myself, it’s for my whole family.
“Also, we do a lot of fundraising and my boys come down to the station to help with the Car Washes, they love it! Get involved in what you can, where you can.
“It’s just getting out there and raising awareness that this is a charity and it needs our help.”
If you’re struggling with your health and wellbeing, we may be able to help you. Call our Support Line on 0800 389 8820, make an enquiry online or register for MyFFC now and visit the ‘Access Support’ tab at the top of the MyFFC homepage.
You can also join our ‘Share Your Story’ Group in MyFFC, by clicking on the ‘Groups’ tab, to chat to others who have received our support or enquire about sharing your own story.